CELLULITE AND THUNDER THIGHS
In one of my last blogs, I spoke about accepting my body, and after years of judging and being judged about my body, I am not sure we all fully get to that place.
We may be very hard people to please.
When I started my intermitting fasting four months ago, I went into it with the full intention of “losing weight.”
My weight loss journey started almost seven years ago and has become much more than just weight loss.
Somehow, the less I see the scale and some number jumping at me, the better I feel. Those numbers can be horrifying depending on the day of the week I do weigh myself.
As for the mirrors, anytime I look at a full-length mirror, I will automatically look at what bothers me the most, my tummy area and the cellulite on my thick thunder thighs.
I scan my tummy areas with little thought, and I shake my head at the pregnancy belly I had.
My tummy feels like pizza dough, and there is no way for me to make my tummy look or sound sexy or appealing unless you are hungry and like the feel of pizza dough.
I also tell myself that I can fix it, and by “fix it,” I mean I have my heart set on doing a tummy tuck, and that is one less eye roll I would have to give myself when I try on clothing and look into the mirror.
There is no shame in a little bit of body-altering.
As for the cellulite. Oh shit!!!!! Where did it all come from?
Note to Self: Sweet Melissa, do not put full-length mirrors in a room with poor lighting; you will miss out on the cellulite printing through your gym pants.
If no one has ever told you, I will say to you.
You can see Cellulite through specific gym leggings. Now let me also tell you this, you will have to have the light right on you, and you will also have to look very carefully to see them through your leggings.
Why am I telling you this? You may be wondering.
Well, for starters, don’t be an ass like me and scrutinize every inch of your body, even with clothes on, and also, no one is watching you that hard trust me.
Cellulite is a fat cell that has been pushed up to the skin’s surface; all sizes of women get them, and the most common areas are the leg, bottom, and belly.
Don’t be alarmed by your cellulite; know that most women have them.
I WILL LOVE MY BODY TILL DEATH DO US PART
It doesn’t help when I log on to the internet, and I never see women with cellulite. It’s as if the “Beauty GODs” gave us cellulite as a curse or punishment.
In the end, the punishment I receive for having Cellulite is from myself when I avoid looking at my body just because I have them.
I have been paying much attention to my looks and body these days. Maybe it’s the birthday coming up in a few months; perhaps it’s me getting back on the dating scene.
I don’t have the body I used to when I was 20. (God, what I would do to have that fine ass body from back in my twenties)
The reality for many of us is that we are not satisfied with our bodies, weight and looks.
As with many of my other weigh-in Wednesday blogs, my message is always the same, when it is going to be enough, when are we going to decide that “hey, my body and weight are not perfect, but I love it anyways” and I am not talking about that type of body love where you stuff your face with junk food 24/7, and make up shity ass excuses why you can’t eat healthily or get your body moving.
If you treat yourself like utter shit, that is not loving yourself or your body. Know the difference!
I move my body and meal prep 75 % of the time, and still, I am judging my body because I don’t look like that woman on TV or IG. Enough is enough, right, but I am human, and so are you. We don’t have to be harsh with ourselves; maybe this journey is a journey of a thousand more miles.
I want to pledge that I will love my body till death do us part, but I think my cellulite has made that pledge for me; that cellulite is here to stay, sure with the proper diet and exercise, it can help with appearance according to google, but it’s here till death do us part.
This weight-loss journey has shown me, in more than one way, how to love my body/self and how I don’t.
What have you learned about your body that you didn’t know?