While most people are going to be planning their new year’s resolution, I say we try our best not to be those people this new year.
We do it every year write a bunch of stuff to get us motivated and sure enough by February 2nd we have either forgotten about the two-page list of goals or have just given up altogether.
I have been there every year, making vision boards, mood boards, buying about 3 different planners because I always told myself I was going to get to my goals.
Some years I have been able to meet them, some years they all failed.
I would get this disappointing feeling or just make another list of endless New Years Resolutions and give up again.
The Pandemic changed the way I looked at New Years Resolution.
It doesn’t matter how many vision boards you have, how many bright and over the top lists you have, how many “new year, new you” quotes you post or retweet. You won’t stick to your resolutions for several reasons, one being you have just put a ton of pressure on yourself.
I am not going to tell you don’t do lists or vision boards. Or that they are a failed system. Look I am a Pisces I get off on daydreaming about my future and being organized. So while those things might be fun and feel productive. I think we can take a step back this coming year and do things differently in the way we approach ourselves when it comes to goals/resolutions.
Let’s try to create habits that stick, routines that work with our life, bring the element of calm to our environment and add a ton of self-love and compassion into the mix with new habits.
No, we do not have to wait for spring to clean. In all honestly decluttering before the new year or within the first weeks will give you a huge head start with creating an environment that is meant to set you up for great vibes and a more settled mind.
According to psychology today decluttering helps with decision-making skills. You have Y amount of stuff and you have X amount of space. Deciding what things go and what stays will evidently lead you to make faster decisions and you’ll be ready to tackle another task at hand such as ORGANIZATION.
I know a few people in my life that I would willingly pay for them to go to an ORGANIZATION BOOT camp if they had one.
Organizing your spaces will lead you to a more calm and clear mind. Meaning, less time fussing around to find something in the kitchen, bedroom, car and office.
Cleaning and Organizing your spaces in your home and office is known to reduce anxiety and help with sleeping.
While decluttering you are sure to find old treasure, but use the Marie Kondo method and ask yourself “does this bring me joy “. I know it may sound silly at first.
We tend to hold on to a lot of junk and fail to even notice that we might be blocking something from coming into our lives. This is where I am going to go a bit woo woo. I believe in energy and good vibes. So here is what I don’t want in my home. I want nothing to do with an EX, things falling apart of me, things I just hate to look at and toys that my son will never play with, oh and clothes I know I have no intentions of wearing this lifetime.
I go through my apartment on a regular basis. I try my best to have it as clean and clutter-free as possible. When I started to watch my money this year I stopped buying unnecessary things to add to a junk pile and when I am super stressed I call a housekeeper to come over and do the cleaning for me. It makes a difference in my mood and my sleep. I am more productive in a clean space and my calmness is at a Level ZEN when my home and office are clean.
FORGET THE GOAL. CREATE A NEW HABIT
The Author of Atomic Habit James Clear mentioned in a TED TALK that you have to create the person you want to be. Let me explain what I learned from his talk.
First, you have to forget the goal. You need to create and do things to be the person you want to be. You have to take actions steps each and every day that will become a habit over time.
For example, you want to become a reader, you tell yourself this is the year you are going to read books, not just buy them but read them.
To become a reader. Read 10 mins each night before bed. The minute you open that book and start reading you are a reader. Over time you will finish the book and even increase the speed you read and you might even find yourself reading for longer periods of time because you now enjoy your new habit.
Putting things like musical instruments, books and yoga mats in a common space where you see it, would remind you to do the act, which will result in RESULTS.
Start with 10 mins. Each day of your desired habit and you will see it won’t be something you are trying to do, it will be something you just do.
You can not expect to run a marathon if you haven’t even trained for it. Taking action steps to create a habit will get you to your goal faster, but even better it will stick. It will become part of who you are.
Every time I don’t feel like writing on my blog I always remember, just a little goes a long way, once the laptop is on and I am writing, I become a writer (with very bad grammar, but I AM A WRITER).
BEYOND THE HABIT
Creating habits go far beyond just working out, reading, writing, learning a new language or musical instrument. Creating habits with your self-care routine is by far the most important habit or resolution you can ever make.
It all comes down to mindset and how you treat and speak to yourself.
Creating habits of checking in with yourself on a daily basis will lead to clarity in the mind, body and soul. The parts of you that feel neglected by the world will get that love, care and attention.
With the rise in mental health due to the pandemic, I would make sure to have a check-in with myself on a regular basis for the sake of myself and my loved ones.
This New Year makes Self Compassion, Self Care, Self Love, Self Respect and Me Time your number one Resolution.
When it comes to creating a new habit/routine, it is a reward system that goes on in our brain. It’s not about how fast we get to be that person, but how consistent we remain over time, while still having compassion for ourselves along the way..
Neuroscientists have traced our habit-making behaviours to a part of the brain called the basal ganglia, which also plays a key role in the development of emotions, memories and pattern recognition. Decisions, meanwhile, are made in a different part of the brain called the prefrontal cortex. But as soon as a behaviour becomes automatic, the decision-making part of your brain goes into a sleep mode of sorts. Read More
2 thoughts on “Forget New Year’s Resolutions: DO THIS INSTEAD”
I liked your create a habit idea! Thanks for sharing, Melissa.
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You’re welcome ☺️