SOCIALLY AWKWARD

MAGIC MONDAYS

I am one of the few people I know who gets excited for Mondays. In all honestly it comes from being in isolation all weekend. Mondays give me a chance to put on clothes because let’s face it when I am home it’s Pj’s or Yoga pants. When Monday comes along I am Adulting. 

Tomorrow I must go back into the Tattoo Shop to get my dressing removed. I am looking forward to that eye candy…lol. The owner who I have been in contact with for all my appointments and follow-up has been exceptionally nice, so I did a google search on him, WOO HOOO, another HOT ONE. I am telling you this Tattoo Shop does not fail to deliver good eye candy. 

I remembered making a note the last time I was at the Tattoo place that I needed to up my filtering game, so I thought about it this weekend. I don’t need to up my filtering game I need some dam social/business skills. 

I consider myself “socially awkward”. I am also an introvert. When I am in a crowd I freeze up, when I am introduced to new people, I get shy. I don’t say much or at times I overtalk because of how nervous and self-conscious I am. 

MEETING NEW PEOPLE IS HARD AT MY AGE (38) 

I have tried to make friends down here, but I keep to myself a lot. I don’t have a childhood bestie of any sort. My sisters are my BFF’s. I went to school in Toronto so most of my school friends are all back home in Toronto.

So, I got to thinking of skills that can improve my business and my social life. Getting out of my comfort zone for sure is required. 

Due to some experiences, I have had with my ex-in-laws, I find it really hard to trust people. Even with my own family down here, it’s hard for me to let anyone too close. The Culture things is another thing I have a hard time with. Anyways I am going off-topic here. 

HOW CAN I IMPROVE MY SOCIAL SKILLS? 

I am going to use the classic book by Dale Carnegie <a rel="noreferrer noopener" href="http://<a target="_blank" href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0671027034/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0671027034&linkCode=as2&tag=nofilterheali-20&linkId=b929b99e5cd9c5d6eaa01aaeb6501aaf">How to Win Friends & Influence PeopleHow To Win Friends And Influence

Leaders like Warren Buffet swear by <a href="http://<a target="_blank" href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0671027034/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0671027034&linkCode=as2&tag=nofilterheali-20&linkId=b929b99e5cd9c5d6eaa01aaeb6501aaf">How to Win Friends & Influence PeopleHow To Win Friends And Influence People by Dale Carnegie, and the lessons of Carnegie have stood the test of time. 

One of the most important rules in the whole book is “Listening Skills”, I have found that I might be locked up, and lacking any social connection. When I do meet someone I know I have verbal diarrhea.  (I am working on it..lol) 

Here are the skills I plan on practicing to improve my social/business skills. It can work too in dating I don’t see why not. People are always more interested in themselves than anyone else. 

1. Do Not Criticize, Condemn or Complain 

2. Be Generous With Praise 

3. Remember Their Name   ( I have been working on this one, recently I have been meeting new people with names that are not very common to me, like the girl that did my tattoo, I asked her about 5 times what her name was, now I have remembered it. When I go in tomorrow I will say hello using her name)

4. Be Genuinely Interested In Other People  (I like to call this “The Power of Attention”. A simple “how are you, or “Hey how have you been, you look great today”. When people feel seen, they like it. Good attention feels GREAT).  

5. Know The Value Of Charm  

6. Be Quick To Acknowledge Your Own Mistakes   

7. Don’t Attempt To “Win” An Argument  (I see this challenging in intimate relationships and skills that will come in handy in the future) 

8. Begin On Common Ground 

9. Have Others Believe Your Conclusion Is Their Own  ( I love this one, I work with very Alpha Males and I find this works best on them) 

10. Make People Feel Important (My father taught me this one long ago, no matter what that person does, treat them with the same respect as you would someone above them)

For a Detail Break down here is a link to FORBES: Press Botton for the link

How did you make friends or improve your social network ?. 

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